I'm throwing pieces of paper at a lemur until he tells me what a lemur is.

I painted my house blue. My neighbour says she has a Phd in blue and my house is green. Even the lemur thinks it's blue, and I didn't have to throw anything at him to get him to say that.

I told the ducks they couldn't sing and now their song is at number one and it's about the ice cream cone that was on my head when I told them they couldn't sing. This undermines what I said about the paint, especially seeing as I have an ice cream cone on my head again. And the lemur is letting the air out of the tyres on my car. This also undermines the lemur's position on the colour of my house.

Roisin Murphy.

Album: Ruby Blue.

She makes most other singers look like they're trying to talk a cat into doing something it doesn't want to do.

Website:

http://www.roisinmurphy.com